Малко полицейски хумор

[Simeon Vlahov <vlahov@spnet.net>]

"Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll
stretch out after you wear them awhile."

"If you take your hands off the car, I'll make your birth
certificate a worthless document." - това е велико

"If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."

"Can you run faster than 1,200 feet per second? In case you didn't
know, that is the average speed of a 9 mm bullet fired from my
gun." 

"So you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I
can write anything I want on the ticket, huh?"

"Yes, Sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't
think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I am the shift
supervisor?" 

"Warning! You want a warning? O.K., I'm warning you not to do that
again or I'll give you another ticket."

"The answer to this last question will determine
whether you are drunk
or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"

"Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a
toaster oven."

"No sir we don't have quotas anymore. We used to have quotas, but
now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we want."

"Just how big were those two beers?"

"I'm glad to hear the Chief of Police is a good personal friend of
yours. At least you know someone who can post your bail."

"You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we
don't. Sign here."
  

-- 
Best regards,
 Simeon                          mailto:vlahov@spnet.net

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